I miss the simple life.

I don't know why I thought coming to a developing country would be simpler than living the US of A.

So, today I had an awesome dinner conversation with my host dad. Here are my thoughts and then I'll get into what was actually said.
My thoughts:
• How can a developing country prosper properly if the body is working hard but the head isn't on right. There is so much that could be done but isn't done because of the politics of it all. It makes me sooo sad. I know there is corruption in all governments but here it's just so clear how detrimental it can be to a country.
• Why do co-workers always think they have to be best friends with their fellow co-workers? Why don't people understand that work should stay at work, which sometimes include the relationship of co-workers? UGH! Let's work and stop working about the fuckin' personal aspect.
• There is just some amazing people out there and having a conversation beats anything you can do with a person. Stimulate my mind and you've got me hooked. This does not have to be interpreted in a sexual manner (even though it also works in that case ;).
• First and foremost, people are human and I think that remains clear now that I have entered into such a different world. And by human, I mean they let emotions run their lives and this includes negative emotions.

So now the conversation….

I haven't updated in forever but try to forget that and just read…listen to my words. :)

I've been having a hard time in Peru because I've recently realized that this is where I reside (I'm in shock-8 months later, I know..crazy). These days I often say that I could work here (and enjoy it!) but I don't know how long I could truly live here. I will explain further because it seems like I can't have one without the other; and yes that is the problem. So, work opportunity is definitely here and it's amazing. I get to stay busy with just bringing some ideas (that are many times new ideas to them but second nature to me) to people and learn about a culture that survives this life in such a different manner. THIS IS TRULY FUCKIN' AWESOME (just emphasizing in case it wasn't clear :)!!! Now for why I'm having a hard time living here. I have to accept all of the faults in this country that are affecting me directly. For example, machismo and the low self esteem it fosters in women. I am a women that does not fit this and it is an experience living here. Also, I have to LIVE here (do you know what that means?)...meaning that I have to have a life here…meaning that I have to find friends…meaning that I have to assimilate to how they live their life a little…meaning I have to give up a lot of my independence…meaning IT'S FUCKIN' HARD…sometimes too hard.

I still haven't gotten to the conversation but I'm getting there..now.

We spoke about the politics of the group of "professionals" that I am working with or going to work with. It was nothing even worth writing about but as you can see it made me realize that I'm living here which made me think of all of the above.

So..yeah.


<3