I miss the simple life.

I don't know why I thought coming to a developing country would be simpler than living the US of A.

So, today I had an awesome dinner conversation with my host dad. Here are my thoughts and then I'll get into what was actually said.
My thoughts:
• How can a developing country prosper properly if the body is working hard but the head isn't on right. There is so much that could be done but isn't done because of the politics of it all. It makes me sooo sad. I know there is corruption in all governments but here it's just so clear how detrimental it can be to a country.
• Why do co-workers always think they have to be best friends with their fellow co-workers? Why don't people understand that work should stay at work, which sometimes include the relationship of co-workers? UGH! Let's work and stop working about the fuckin' personal aspect.
• There is just some amazing people out there and having a conversation beats anything you can do with a person. Stimulate my mind and you've got me hooked. This does not have to be interpreted in a sexual manner (even though it also works in that case ;).
• First and foremost, people are human and I think that remains clear now that I have entered into such a different world. And by human, I mean they let emotions run their lives and this includes negative emotions.

So now the conversation….

I haven't updated in forever but try to forget that and just read…listen to my words. :)

I've been having a hard time in Peru because I've recently realized that this is where I reside (I'm in shock-8 months later, I know..crazy). These days I often say that I could work here (and enjoy it!) but I don't know how long I could truly live here. I will explain further because it seems like I can't have one without the other; and yes that is the problem. So, work opportunity is definitely here and it's amazing. I get to stay busy with just bringing some ideas (that are many times new ideas to them but second nature to me) to people and learn about a culture that survives this life in such a different manner. THIS IS TRULY FUCKIN' AWESOME (just emphasizing in case it wasn't clear :)!!! Now for why I'm having a hard time living here. I have to accept all of the faults in this country that are affecting me directly. For example, machismo and the low self esteem it fosters in women. I am a women that does not fit this and it is an experience living here. Also, I have to LIVE here (do you know what that means?)...meaning that I have to have a life here…meaning that I have to find friends…meaning that I have to assimilate to how they live their life a little…meaning I have to give up a lot of my independence…meaning IT'S FUCKIN' HARD…sometimes too hard.

I still haven't gotten to the conversation but I'm getting there..now.

We spoke about the politics of the group of "professionals" that I am working with or going to work with. It was nothing even worth writing about but as you can see it made me realize that I'm living here which made me think of all of the above.

So..yeah.


<3

Happy 3 months to meeee in site!!!

So, that's right I've made it 1/8th of the way and, honestly, so far, much better! It ONLY took 3 months in site and about 6 months in Peru(I make my 1/2 a year away from the states on March 11th!!!!!!!) to finally be comfortable. In my community, people know me and actually like me (Don’t be surprised!). I just finished up my English classes last week and it's official, I want to work with monsters. I love that when kids are determined to do something how they accomplish so much. I am starting a youth group, for sure. It'll include health topics, life skills, and leadership type of training/learning/building. I'm excited for it because some of the kids are even more excited for it..SUCCESS! As for other health shit/work, I am trying to properly promote family gardens and hopefully start monthly talks on health topics. I am working on organizing this more so it can actually be productive. In the future, I think "cocinas mejoradas" (more effective firewood stoves) might be a bigger project of mine but we'll see.

The truth: To tell you the truth, the climbing is still rough but sooooo much more bearable (plus, my ass loves it. ha,). I still have a pee bucket that I use every now and then - it's such a lifesaver in the middle of the night. I mostly wear hiking boots or else I die. Rain still makes my life hell but I've gained more balance and the ability to fall with even more grace than before - oh and I walk with a staff or as I call it "my stick." Food still isn't the best part of my day (especially if all I get is rice or potatoes for breakfast - I've always hated breakfast and now I could def live without it FOREVER) but it satisfies my hunger and it is starting to taste much better. I have built a pretty good support system here with my fellow PCVs (yea, you guessed it - they are amazing; most at least) and that makes my future super exciting (having friends all over the USA will be loads of fun!). My happy times include talking to my peeps back home (phone calls make me feel like I'm not in a different continent) or hanging out with peeps here or getting a whole room of Peruvians laughing or going raspberry picking with the biggest monster in the world (3 yr old host brother) or simply babysitting the smaller monster (1 yr old host bro).

I'm not sure/don't remember if I have mentioned this but things in my life (it has always been this way for me) are always better when I have something grand to look forward to and this upcoming month it is my first visitors!!! My mother and my nieces are coming! Plus, it's going to feel like Christmas because they come bearing gifts!! It's not until the end of the month but that works because I have a lot I should accomplish before then. I guess it isn't the little things for me..it's the BIG (GRANDIOSE!) things that make me the happiest right now or maybe always.

Well, I hope this has been entertaining and a bit informative. I don't even know who still reads this but I'll continue to update just in case there are avid readers.

I miss and love all my lovers!! <3

P.S. Boys suck in all countries. Ha.

CaRnAvAl WhOa!

This time of year is fuckin' fun, fun, and fun!! Get that? That is right, it is fun!

When and how did it all start?
So, this actually began back in December for me. Yea, that's right December. After becoming a PCV, I became aware that I would be living in the department of Peru that does Carnaval the best. This all really excited meee! I began looking forward to this event every time I thought of the next BIG thing that I would be doing. The time finally came and that time was this passed weekend.

What was it like?
I think everyone should do it and then you'll know. I mean unless you don't like to be painted on or wet or should I say unless you don’t like to have fun. Ha. If that's you, do I know and like you? Probably not. Mayhem in the streets. Party in the streets. Dancing in the streets. Just loads of street fun. DO IT!!

So, I don't know if this made much sense but what I wanted everyone to get is how much fun it was…fo' realz.

One more thought or story. Once I returned to my community, I thought I would be done with Carnaval. WRONG!! It turns out my town was partying all of the day before and today. So, this is the kind of party it was: There is this tree that is filled with "presents." The "presents" are things like sheets, baskets, brooms, and you know. They call it a "Yunsa" or something like that. I arrived just in time to see what happens to this tree of "presents." Did you guess it?? Well, they chop it down, it falls somewhere (hopefully not on top of people) and then men run to get a present. So, yea…it is the same idea of a pinata except there are men literally fighting for sheets and buckets. This was SUPER interesting to watch. I hope you can imagine it because it's a site to see.

But yes, Peru continues to surprise me and that amazes me. I like it here, for now.

P.S. Someone video taped our fun...there is creepers all around the world. DUH, right? :)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4acUCn8ic54

Mmmm…sheep blood anyone?

So, my dinner today was sheep blood with potatoes. I know it sounds totally disgusting BUT it was pretty good. I mean it is true that I do love some blood so maybe my opinion is a little bias. Haha. (This reminds me, I can't wait for True Blood's new season to begin!!) So, blood and potatoes get 2 thumbs up. Along with this delicacy, I had some milk with grinded wheat…so bangin.' But yea, that's all I got for you peeps! I hope food (and everything else) is as good as I remember it being! <3

p.s. One of the kitties peed on my plastic roof…gotta love it!

Happy 2 months!!

That is right! So, this means I am officially 2 months in site and almost 5 months in Peru. That hasn't been so bad. Ha. To think, I ONLY have 22 months until I complete service. It feels so long but I know it really isn't. Weeks are beginning to fly by and accomplishing anything is an everyday task. I am sometimes super exhausted just thinking of the possibilities but that just might be my daily hikes. Blah.

I am definitely feeling like there is so much to do and so little time. Time really scares me because there is no rewinding it.

On the same note, Can YOU believe that January 2010 is pretty much over?? Talk about time passing by…

Has someone invented that teleporting machine yet? :)

Doggie ear tragedy.

That's just it. The ONLY dog in Peru that I like is Cholo, the family dog, and he was attacked!! A stupid vicious dog decides that he doesn't like Cholo and begins a fight. This stupid dog also has a stupid friend dog that decides to attack Cholo. Two evil dogs against the nicest dog ever; needless to say, it was tragic to watch. The evil dogs almost bite off Cholo's ear and severely injure the his leg. Cholo didn't die thanks to the intervention of humans. My host grandma sees what is happening to Cholo and begins to yell for her son while grabbing a piece of wood and running toward the crime scene. She uses this piece of wood to beat the evil dogs; sometimes hitting their heads. Her son also has run to the crime scene and is profusely beating the hell out of the dogs; he also hits the evil dogs in the head. This only made one of the evil dogs run away while the other evil dog (obviously the more evil of the 2) continues to try and bite Cholo's ear off; he had no mercy! Finally, this evil dog's owner comes with a belt and begins beating him and it isn't until then that Cholo is free! So, to make things completely clear at one point the evil-er dog was beat by all 3 people at the same time and still did not let go. Soooo…there is reason to my madness. These dogs have no mercy and I do not want anything to do with them!

I HATE THESE FUCKING DOGS!

p.s. Cholo is doing well and seems like he will have a speedy recovery! I might go in search of dog treats because he deserves them for being the ONLY good dog in Peru.

Two thoughts: tupperware potatoes and hitchhiking.

Ok, so Tupperware potatoes was my lunch today. YUCK? Yea, a little BUT they were made and brought just for meee. I was going for a long walk with my host Grandma to town and she thought I would be hungry considering it was lunch time and I had ate a light breakfast. I ate my Tupperware potatoes on the side of the road and it was super hilarious. Every bite I took made me giggle. I just never thought that I would EVER be eating Tupperware potatoes. So, HA!

As for hitchhiking, that is my main form of transportation. Whenever I want to go down to town and do NOT want to do the hour walk, I have to hope that a car or mototaxi passes by and picks my ass up. It's just how shit is done here but it definitely is still hitchhiking. I get in a car (sometimes on the bed of pick-up truck) with complete strangers, that I always hope aren't crazy fucks, that take me into town. And yes, it is ALWAYS an adventure.

So yea, today was a day of both things: Tupperware potatoes and hitchhiking. I know you are thinking how lucky I am. Well, you are right! Ha.

Still living it up..one bark at a time.

So, I recently got an email from a good friend of mine that really knows how scared I am of dogs that said that she´s happy to know that they aren´t really a problem. I started to laugh because that is so not the case. I guess I haven´t really written about it and that´s simply because I try not to think of those beasts. Sadly, everywhere I walk there is a dog barking and ready to eat me alive or at least that´s how it feels. I expected this and it´s becoming ¨normal.¨ I recently began to do my house visits for the surveys I have to do in my community and I pretty much got bitten about 10 times. Almost....definitely doesn´t count in these situations. So yea, I yell a lot but luckily I never walk alone and that makes it better facing those beasts.

So, yea...I´ve started doing my house visits which is a super interesting time. Meeting people in their household is good because I actually get to see their health practices. I am also teaching!!!! It´s kinda cool except when there are millions of kids and I don´t know what do do with them. haha. I don´t know...everything is going well.

My mom is coming on March 31st which is super fucking awesome. I miss home a bunch sometimes but that´s life. I don´t think I´d trade this...I often feel like this IS the good life!!!

Life changing day.

So, today is a big day in my way of living. For a little over a month, I have been living in a huge dirt room with just a bed, a table, and a light bulb. Today is the day I got 4 plugs in my room. That’s like living the real high life; you don’t even know! I got to plug everything I could imagine and enjoyed every second of it. I’m actually still enjoying it! If you know me, you know that I looove electronics. I have an unhealthy attachment to most of my electronic devices and this one month or so has been a true struggle. Now that it’s all over, I think that I will actually buy some speakers and do it up like I used to back in the day. This is what is scary but supposed to be good – when you start feeling comfortable in such different and once unfamiliar situations. I am still in a dirt room (where I bucket bathe in so it becomes a muddy room), a table, a light bulb, and now 4 plugs and this does not seem at all uncomfortable. I still don’t have a window and sometimes use my pee bucket at night or in rainy days (it rains a lot here) but that doesn’t make me feel out of place. I feel quite comfortable having the little amenities that I do and I am not bothered easily by slightly gross things (like finding 2 tarantulas in the last weeks IN my room). I often wonder if this is because I know this life isn’t permanent. It reminds me of my old job where I knew I was only there until I graduated college. Although some things bothered me, they never REALLY got to me because it never felt like I’d be there forever. When I think about it now, I was there for a shit load of years and I grew super comfortable – Could it be because I wasn’t worried about permanency? I think I hate permanency; is that a problem? I would like certain people to be a permanent part of my life; does that count for anything?

This was just another Barbara-thought filled with a semi- update on life events…

As always, looooooove and miss everyone greatly!

p.s. Remember yoyos? Well, it has been the best thing I have “found” in someone’s room. I am easily entertained and “walking the dog” does it for me. YAY! Go YOMEGA!!!